Heavenly Father up in thy Heaven, I know you will be with me in the new year, please help me to open my eyes to see you are with me when darkness tries to cloud my thoughts. When the air thins in my mind, my thoughts start to go drastic and create an unrealistic narrative, put your hand on my mind, for where your touch is, darkness cannot exist. I pray for my friends and family that are lost, that the feel your love and can see your wonders. I pray that their eyes become open in their hearts to you, and see how Great You are Lord. I pray that I will be in your will, that I will be someone you can use, even though I not enough. Even though I am not smart or knowledgeable in your word, through you, you let me have understanding, that I might share it with someone to help see you. I am so broken, please let me keep your joy in my mind always, and stay positive. Please lord help me not self sabotage, as I am so quick to think into old habits of self destruction. I don’t want to be in pain anymore Lord. And I know when I am close to you, I don’t hurt. I’m not afraid and I have peace when I am with you Lord. You saved me when I wasn’t worth anything, when I saw myself as nothing, you showed me a love I never knew. A love that was hard to accept and is still hard to accept sometimes. Because I mess up so much, but I never take your forgiveness for granted. I try so hard. But you forgive me when I could never forgive myself. When I feel others hold onto my past mistakes, you wipe my slate clean every day, every hour when I come so humbly to you in apology. And I feel your forgiveness Lord. It washes over me and I could never have enough words or voice to express my thankfulness and gratitude. Lord I pray to be more confident in your word, to trust in you and myself. Because when I don’t believe in myself, how can I believe in you? I will try my hardest to trust in your confidence in me. Though I am sorry Lord I will fail, because I am the lowest of all things. Lord please help me in friendships that will grow with the shower of your word, with heavenly conversation and peace. Help me to let go of thoughts and people that bring me away from you and your plan for me. Please help me and give me the strength, to keep holding on when the pain is too great. When I am tired Lord, so tired, help me remember your wonders. Help me remember your works in my life. Bring to remembrance my part in testimonies that you have gifted to me Lord. Such a precious gift that I don’t deserve. But I thank you God, so much for those gifts. And Lord please be with Chloe and Terry. Though I forget them sometimes, please help me to do better and share your word in your timing Lord, not mine. I will be patient. And please help me not get discouraged Lord. I wont give up. You have told me too many times my time is not here yet. I will not argue with you, and I will try to be more patient. Lord, I just want to thank you for all things. Thank you for the people you have put into my life, and thank you for letting me feel the power of prayer Lord. Thank you most for letting me understand your word. I just want to rest here forever Lord, at your feet, in this prayer. I wish I could stay in this moment forever, but I know on this earth I cannot. It will all be worth it one day. Thank you for John Lord, and please watch over him and keep him safe. Remember all the prayers of the church, and forgive me when I fall short. I am yours Lord, and please keep me in your will, not mine Lord. Everyday help me to see you are with me and your hand on my heart and mind Lord. Thank you. In Jesus precious name. Amen.